Growing Up In a Funeral Home

August 15, 2014

I was born in Vernon, BC in 1969. My father established the Pleasant Valley Funeral Home there in approximately 1975.  At the early age of 6 I was hanging around the funeral home during its construction, and also after its completion.  The life of a Funeral Director/Owner is definitely tied to the business and there would be many times when we as kids (my older brother and sister and I) would have to wait for Dad to finish up his work for the day before we could go out as a family.  I recall running around the funeral home playing tag or hide and seek.  I, being the youngest and smallest, was exceptionally good at scooting under the pews in the chapel. 

 

My father was always conscientious to ensure that we would not wander into the morgue if there was an embalming/preparation of a body underway, but it would not be uncommon for us to be around a deceased person once they were prepared for the funeral and ready for a viewing.  I recall asking my father once, “What are you painting daddy?” as he was applying the final make-up touches on a woman.  He explained it wasn’t paint but make-up, and why she needed to have some colour to restore her appearance.  I wanted to see, but I was only 6 and thus quite short.  Dad picked me up so I could have a good look.  Of all the questions I could have asked (What is dead? Where is Heaven?), I asked my Dad, “Where are her legs?”  It appears that 6 years olds ask very obvious questions!  The question makes complete sense when you realize that only half of the lid of a casket is opened for viewing the deceased.  My Father took away the flowers that were sitting on the bottom half of the casket and opened up the whole lid, removing any mysterious, preconceived ideas of what might have happened to her legs. I was satisfied and ran off to play with my siblings.

 

Life and Death all around us. Photo courtesy of Dreamstime

 

  I am thankful for the way in which my father made the end of life as natural and unthreatening as he did.  It was simply understood that everyone is born and everyone dies.  I have come to realize that my upbringing and the natural day to day understanding of the fact “in the midst of life we are surrounded by death” is not the norm, yet I wouldn’t want to have had it any other way.  I was never overwhelmed with grief, darkness, or melancholy.  I just understood that this is the way the world is.  I feel we need to be open with our children to talk about death (i.e. loss, separation), because it is going to happen and it is a great common denominator in all of our lives.  When we learn to accept the reality of it, we are then able to heal after a death occurs. 

 

 

 

 



Tags: , , , ,

Testimonials

They took care of me like family.

Judith Szabo

Everything was so organized and pertinent to what we needed. Everyone we met was kind, courteous and very helpful during our emotional and challenging time. Thank you so much.

Heather Mayne

They were so prompt on answering any questions and changing things. They were prepared and respected any religious decisions. The process was so seamless and made easy in such a high stress situation.

Tanya Kohar

In the past 2 years Springfield has helped us through the death of my Mother and my Father. Their response and help allowed us to focus on the remaining family rather than worrying about details of the funeral and all the notifications that are required upon a death.

Terry Eldridge

The atmosphere has been nothing but professional during times of grief.  After the passing of my mother, the staff coached me on the next steps and looked after filling in all the government forms that I needed to sign, which took a huge burden off my mind at the time.

Donald McClure

Everyone was so helpful and kind.  There was no pressure.  They provided exactly what we needed.

Diane Greenwood

From the time I called to the completion of all the services, I received compassionate, attentive and professional care.  There was a sense of caring from each staff member.  I was turning over my Mom to their care and I felt very comfortable with everyone.  I felt heard and never felt pushed into any decision.

Katherine Lewis

I have always found the team at Springfield Funeral Home to be VERY caring, kind, considerate and helpful.  I have and will continue to recommend them to anyone who asks which funeral home would I suggest they use.  No other funeral home I have dealt with even comes close to Springfield Funeral Home.

Ethna Tutt

Right at the onset, I was made very comfortable, there was no pressure.  I was made to feel as if I was the only one they had to serve.

Frances Baum

Everything that was arranged for us was perfect.  Our loved one, husband, father, brother was treated with respect.  Thank you for making this difficult time a little more acceptable via your staff’s obvious caring and respect.

Jacquelene Bluschke